Okay, Listen Here

Okay, Listen Here

Monday, April 25, 2011

A Formal Feeling

Jean here. I don't have it in me to use my whimsical Pantster logo today.

Not long ago, when flipping through a notebook, I found a where I had started and abandoned a shopping list.

Underneath I had written. "I need to buy tomatoes, coffee, and toilet bowl cleaner. But David is dead, so how is that possible?"


Beverly and Kathy, RWA Conference, 2010


I have no memory of writing those words but I recall, in all too vivid detail, the feeling. I think Emily Dickinson described it best as a formal feeling.

Today, I feel that again. The world is a poorer place for the loss of Beverly Barton.

She was my friend and someone I deeply admired. I didn't know her longer or better than most of the people in her life, but when we met almost five years ago, something clicked between us. Because we held similar views on very important things like cloth napkins, hostess gifts, and silver iced tea spoons, she always teased me that we were sisters.

I took that as a compliment of the highest degree because nothing in Beverly's life was more important to her than family—not her career, not her New York Times Bestseller status, not the air she breathed.

At first, I thought I wanted to write about some things she would want to be remembered for. Then I thought, "Who am I to make such assumptions?" There are those who could, but it's not me.

So I am going to mention a few things I would like to see her remembered for. I think Beverly would be all right with that.

Beverly and Stephanie at RWA Conference, 2010

  • She was the consummate professional.
  • She was every inch a lady.
  • She was living out her Happily Ever After.
  • She wanted everyone to succeed. She would tell you what she had learned. If it was something she hadn't learned on her own, she gave credit to the person who taught her.
  • She was the epitome of kindness and grace but it was not of the meek sort. Her generosity of spirit and sweetness came with fire and life.
  • Her shoes and bag always matched.

Today, I have to buy milk, lemons, and laundry detergent. How is that possible?







19 comments:

  1. Jean, this was lovely, just like Beverly. She was *such* a remarkable woman.

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  2. Beverly radiated a light like no other. What a nice tribute, Jean. She really was living out her HEA.

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  3. Thank you for a lovely tribute! You encapsulated her spirit. Hugs!

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  4. Hugs to you and everyone else in HOD who knew her so much better than those of us who only had the pleasure of talking to her on occasion.

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  5. So true, Jean. (And so funny you should bring up cloth napkins. I just wrote my tribute to Beverly for the blog tomorrow, and guess what it's about?)

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  6. And I wrote something about family. I think the fact we all saw the same things about her means they were *that* important to Beverly.

    And I know exactly how you feel about the formal feeling. I need to reconcile my checkbook but how is that possible?

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  7. Very touching Jean. She was truly every inch a lady, someone I admired. The world is a sadder place today because she is gone.

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  8. I feel so sad for you all, for HOD, for all her family and friends. I'm praying God's comfort over each one of you. There's just a heavy feeling over life when you've lost a loved one. Hugs and love to you, Jean.

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  9. Melanie, you said it so well,"There is just a heavy feeling."

    I think it is important to celebrate Beverly! She was such an inspiration for many of us. The love she had for her family and friends is a wonderful example to us all!

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  10. Thank you for this post, Jean. The world just isn't right and I'm not sure it ever can be again.

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  11. Lovely post, Jean. It made me cry, but then, I've done that a lot the last few days. Beverly was so full of life and such a wonderful person. I still just can not believe I will never see her on this earth again. I don't know if I've ever met anyone as happy and infectious as her before. You couldn't be around her without being happy. That seems another wonderful way to be remembered.

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  12. Jean, I love this tribute. You've captured her spirit so well. Big hugs to all of you, and I'll be there to hug you in person this weekend.

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  13. Here under the tulip tree, we usually answer all the comments individually, but we are all so like minded in our grief that I decided not to do that today. All of your comments about Beverly ring so true. I think this shows how she shared herself completely with such candor. That's not a bad thing to aspire to.

    Thank you all for stopping by.

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  14. (I've been unable to post until now. Beverly meant the world to me.

    You've written a lovely ode to our dear friend, Jean. Thank you for sharing the photo of the two of us, Jean. That means the world to me.

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  15. Jean, beautiful tribute. As an RS writer, I'd only heard of Beverly and her terrific books, but I feel as if I know her now. This is indeed a loss for HOD and the writing community. Thank you for sharing these thoughts.

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  16. Kathy--It is a beautiful picture!

    Linsey--thank you for stopping by. It is, indeed, a great loss.

    Lynn--You are sweet. I treasure you.

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  17. I was shocked to read of Beverly's passing. Your tribute is very lovely . I must say I disagree with one line though. The world is not a poorer place because she is gone....the world is a better and brighter place because she lived in it and touched so many lives. Remember her beauty, grace, talent and spirit! I think she would not want you to grieve. I only met her a couple of times at the HOD luncheons but she strikes me as a person who would want you all to celebrate the life she led and take a leaf out of "her book" (so to speak) and go forth with the same beauty,grace,spirit and love of family and friends. Count yourself blessed that you knew her and rest in the fact that you will meet again. :-)

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