Okay, Listen Here

Okay, Listen Here

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Psychedelic Dresses - a 70"s Flashback

Dresses. Have you looked at them lately? I feel like I am having a Sixties/Seventies flashback and it’s not a good trip. I started looking for a dress for the Heart of Dixie Luncheon set for April 30th. I thought, what with my new weight loss and new hairstyle (thanks Maven Linda), I could pull off wearing one of those cute new spring dresses I keep seeing on television. Girded for battle, I started shopping.

The first thing I noticed upon walking into the department store was the harsh kaleidoscope of colors – brown with pinks, orange with pink, chartreuse (no one looks good in this so why even try to pawn it off on us?) – My Gosh who did this? Have they never heard of the Color Wheel? Somebody obviously forgot you cannot combine Spring with Summer colors. A definite disaster.

I courageously went forward. I WANTED to wear a dress to the HOD luncheon. I plowed ahead, fingers swiping through racks, looking and rejecting each. Too old, too young. I kept thinking of the saying from “Fried Green Tomatoes”: I’m too old to be young and too young to be old. I quickly decided to go to the designer section. Surely the designers would be more circumspect and make a lovely dress for someone my age. WRONG. I was met with the same color explosions or old lady chiffon. Where were the cute dresses?

I went to another store and found a few that I thought I might could pull off. I chose what I thought would be my new size, draped some dresses across my arm and then headed for the dressing rooms. I hung them up, ruefully eyeing my choices. I plucked the first one from the dressing room hook and tried to get it on. Yes, tried, there was no zipper. Okay, so it slipped over the head. I struggled and finally got it on. My Gosh, what was I thinking? The view look like sausage stuffed in a casing! I HAD lost weight so what was this? Best to get out of this nightmare. Or so I thought. Have you ever been stuck in a $250.00 dress in a department store and can’t get out of it? I pulled; I struggled until finally I managed to get the dad-blasted thing off. I got dressed and picked all the dresses up, intending on going out to find a LARGER size. As I was walking out of the dressing room, I noticed a girl about my height and a good sixty pounds heavier telling her mom that she needed a smaller size – two sizes smaller than the one I just tried on. I started to say “Good Luck with that” but figured I didn’t want to be found dead in the dressing room when the store closed. She was a lot bigger than me…

I went from store to store, searching, trying on dresses, rejecting dresses, and getting depressed. Finally I gave up. Leaving the last store, I saw a lovely jacket, shell and pants, all lined up for me. Guess I’ll be wearing pants again this year…

Do you feel like all the designers think we want to dress like we were twenty? Maybe some of you ladies out there are closer to twenty but for those of us who don’t want to be like “bless her heart” Aunt Mary wearing a mini dress what are we to do? So, tell me, are there any places that have chic dresses that aren’t made for teenagers? Tell me about your latest shopping expedition and what you found (probably peasant blouses, halter dresses, and psychedelic colors – flashback anyone?)


  1. Oh, I so feel your pain. I have been trotting out the same dresses and skirts for years because I can't find anything I like nowadays. I am in the awkward age of "too old to be young, too young to be old" too. I finally found some skirts and stuff up in Canada (yes--took going there to find clothes I liked). Then I found a few things here, but I pushed the envelope on the hemline. Oh well. The legs are still good.

    I don't know what I will wear to the luncheon, but I do plan to be there with a smile on my face :-)

  2. I went shopping for a luncheon outfit a couple of weeks ago and went through the same thing. I was looking for a dress in a pretty spring color, and ended up with a skirt and blouse in black and white. Not only were the colors in the store NOT to my liking, the preferred length of dresses this year seems to be knee length. I don't look good in dresses that short AND they require pantyhose. Horrors.

  3. I'll probably be wearing pants to the luncheon. I gave up on dresses years ago.

  4. I am very short waisted so it is very rare that I find skirts usually fit me much better than dresses.

    I love, love, love skirts. I wear skirts all year except for the dead of winter and I really miss them then.

    I agree that sizes seem to get smaller and smaller! I HATE that!!

  5. Hey Christine. Yeah, I was willing to wear the shorter dress but just not the colors. Also, I couldn't believe how small those dresses were. I felt like a giant.

    I got black pants and a teal aqua shirt LJ. I just can't wear those wild colors. I would have worn panty hose if I could have gotten a dress - that's how determined and desperate I was.

    Maven Linda, I have now joined your ranks. I simply gave up on the dresses too.

    Stephanie, I didn't even think about a skirt. How stupid of me! I may have to go back and look. Maybe I could find one in my size whatever that is. I swear, I don't know why they are making everything smaller. I too hate it!!!

  6. Maybe some hot pants and Nehru jacket. Go go boots. Yeah. That's it.

  7. Jean, once upon a time I had all three. Go Go boots -- white. Hot pants -- several colors (I had good legs, then). Nehru jacket -- orange and yellow print. (what was I thinking?) I also had lime green bell bottom pants (my FAVORITES!) and platform shoes. Ah, fashion. :-)

  8. Well, y'all know I love high heels -- and I love to wear dresses or skirts with them. I'll keep doing that as long as I can. ;)

    Cheryl, you are not a giant! The problem is that sizes can vary between designers. Sometimes I need a 10. Sometimes an 8, and very surprisingly I just bought skirts in a size 4 because the others were too big. Yet most of the 8 and 10 dresses I own still fit, so there's definitely some sizing tricks going on with the company that makes the 4. :/

    The key is to find stuff that fits the boobs. You can always have the waist or hem tailored. Off the rack clothes almost always need some nipping and tucking. :) So don't be discouraged! It's not you! You are gorgeous and will look fabulous, I am certain. :)

  9. Sorry I didn't respond today. Lots going on here at my place.

    Oops! I hope no one says that I don't dress my age. I love clothes and desire to experiment. I'm not willing to be old yet. ;)