On The Rocks with Salt and Conversation Please

Back before we took on the boys at Trivia Night (me and the Margarita Mamas), we had a lively discussion amongst ourselves about the necessity of women’s underthings.   Women and their brassieres!  Lordy mercy what a conversation to have in a small town restaurant over too many margaritas!  It made me feel like I was in a Jill Shalvis story in Lucky Harbor!  

So le’me tellya!  I learned a lot that night.  What, you ask?  Huh!  Did you know that some women wear more than one bra thinking that that gives them more support?  I had no idea!  I mean, yes, I do have my own personal structural engineer employed to build me the tightest constraint for boobages known to mankind.  But geeze!  I only wear one.  I couldn’t possible breathe with two on.  Two.  Really?  I told Twinkle Toes we need to take her shopping and get her her own structural engineer, too!  She just waved her arms in the air, free spirit that she is and ordered another round!  Ricardooooo….oooo!

Then Southern Belle.  She told us all about having her boobages accosted at the local lingerie store.  She said she walked into the store and straightway a young woman who’d just recently started wearing her own training bra marched right up to SB and started feeling her up with a tape measure in hand.   Now I have to say, I’m glad that young girl was not me.  Polite and sweet as SB can be, the woman can hurt you with just her eyeballs!  I’m surprised she didn’t take that girl to the mat!  So what happened in the end?  SB got the best bra she’s ever had.  Said that girl did her a service that day and she bought them out of the bra that fit.  Success?  Yes.  Hey Ricardo…..can we get another, please?

Now Damn Yankee, for some reason, I just can’t remember what she threw into the mix.  I must’ve been under Mr T. Quilla’s spell at that point?  Nah.  Did she evade the topic?  You bet your sweet margaritas she did!   Ricardo…I think my glass has a hole in it.  DY quirks and eyebrow up as high as it’ll go and taps the side of her glass.  Another?  

Now I have to confess.  I did pipe up at this point and give my two cents worth, structural engineer retainer that I am.  And honey chile, I got down and dirty and brought out the big guns.  Yes I did.  The one time, all time fixit for the boobages.  You know the one…..the Big  Lift and Tuck!  You heard me.  With the Big Lift and Tuck I would never wear a bra again.  Wow!  How liberating would that be?  And besides, Mary Jo Shively (Annie Potts) from Designing women discovered that big boobages are power.  But think of it.  Big boobages that are where they belong have got to be the mother of all power!  Yes indeedy!  That right there is Lushy Lulu's idea of brassiere perfection.  The Big Lift and Tuck!  

How about you?  Would you hire an engineer to build you a boobages contraption?   

What's your favorite Margarita?  

Original Lime

Strawberry

Watermelon

Mango